I wrote the following last autumn during the closing stages of finishing the text for my latest book (Rewild Yourself: Becoming Nature 😉 ). I had been sat inside writing, concentrating, for so long that I was in danger of forgetting that which drove me, that which I was writing about in the first place. So I went outside just to feel, just to be, to rekindle that wild, alive, feeling that dwindles when you are inside for too long and don’t feed it, that essential wild spark that we all hold within ourselves.
It is easy to forget that it exists at all as I sit tamed behind my computer. Stiff from hours of sitting and intense concentration I stretch in my chair once more. Looking up I notice the beautiful blue sky through the skylight in my office. It’s time for a break.
I go downstairs and open the back door. It hits me with a tingly rush, the freshness of the air. The concrete yard is carpeted with the fallen reds and oranges of Acer which sit in pots between bamboos creating a living screen for the brick wall behind. I climb the ugly grey concrete steps and duck to avoid disturbing the intricate webs strung accross the path above my head. Already I feel more animal.
I breathe deeper. My shoulders roll back. The rusty faces of St Johns Wort flowers long since bloomed, greet me as I reach the garden. Leaves and fallen plums litter the medicine lawn ~ my grassy patch. I stop a while and listen to all the birds and other rustlings. I disturb a grey squirrel who dances across the top of the wooden fence and shoots up the trunk of the nearest tree. I breathe deeper still.
There is a delicious warmth to the sun and I sit with my eyes closed, face turned upward toward the fiery disc to receive it. Legs straight in front, arms propping me up from behind, hands broad and fingers well spaced. I can feel the pulse of the Earth rising up my arms. I feel invited to lay back. My spine feels supported by the gentle undulations of the ground beneath me. I kick my slippers off and feel the sticky grass with my toes. Time melts, my pace slows.
I breathe it all in, all the mulchy autumn smells. I turn my head and watch the insects in the grass buzzing between late flowering herbs. I am full, full of joy. The whole of me feels alive and my face is full of smile. I remember. I remember that I am part of this and my heart beats a little stronger.
That is the feeling that I attempt to convey In Rewild Yourself, the reconnection with the rest of nature, that feeling of vitality, of being abundantly alive. We don’t need to go far to find it because it is within us all, we were born wild animals, we each still have it within us. So when you are feeling tired or weary, down or ungrounded, disconected or disappointed, just take a moment of time, go outside, find a patch of grass and lie down, take it in, remember… Rewild Yourself!
For more rewilding ideas, to remember you are Gaia, to draw nature into your life more and more, I invite you to grab yourself a copy of my latest book Rewild Yourself: Becoming Nature 🙂